Minor league baseball game settles ‘Star Wars’ vs. ‘Star Trek’ with a dance battle

The best way to settle Star Wars vs. Star Trek is to have a massive three-hour film featuring characters from both franchises battling it out for sci-fi supremacy. That will probably never happen. So the second-best way to settle Star Wars vs. Star Trek is at a minor league baseball game.

The Fresno Grizzlies, Triple-A affiliate of the Astros, had Star Wars night on Saturday, giving everyone free rein to dress up as their favorite Jedi, Stormtrooper, Sith Lord, or whatever the hell Yoda is. It was supposed to be a good time, until people dressed up in Star Trek costumes walked in, so they confronted each other while Ennio Morricone’s theme from The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly played. (You know what, we’re already mixing franchises; we might as well add western movie theme music.)

But fans are affected, too, and the truest test of one’s dedication to the cause is one’s willingness to sit out getting shat on by rain for hours on end, just to witness a potential advancement to the College World Series.

Some might describe this as cavalier folly. Others might cite the Gators’ dramatic walkoff victory on Saturday night again, after a four-hour rain delay as factual evidence that the end of this game bears witnessing. Wherever you land on these fans’ collective decision to stick it out, one thing is indisputable: they’re getting absolutely drenched on purpose.

I used Baseball-Reference to search for shortstops from the last 20 years, and I used their quick-‘n’-dirty guide on what WAR totals usually mean, which is this:

The Yankees have enjoyed, at a minimum, starting-caliber seasons from their shortstop in 17 of the past 20 seasons. This is not a surprise. Derek Jeter had 15 of those seasons, And Didi Gregorius had two. There have not been a lot of seasons in which the Yankees have wondered what they were going to do about their shortstop.

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The Pistons are in no position to pass on the best talent available.

3’s Company features A.I. and DerMarr Johnson. You might think we’d want another scorer here — maybe Latrell Sprewell or Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf. You’d think wrong. Iverson, who is the team’s coach, captain, and star, will be leading the BIG3 in scoring come hell or high water. Joe Smith is a fellow rapper and Virginian. I daresay he’s a lock at No. 2.

You’re sensing a trend with the team names, yes? The Killer 3s feature Chauncey Billups and Stephen Jackson. I’m perplexed, actually, that this team isn’t called the Rachel Nichols All-Stars. Along with his BIG3 contract and Killer 3s jersey, Reggie is guaranteed at least one Cheap NFL Jerseys appearance on The Jump this season.

Markkanen is a special shooter at 7 feet tall. He has a quick release and can score in the pick-and-pop or running off a screen. Andrew Wiggins, Karl-Anthony Towns, and Zach LaVine will appreciate the driving lanes.

The Pistons are in no position to pass on the best talent available. Collins offers two-way potential at the five, and could even become a match next to Andre Drummond if he continues to develop his jump shot.

The Pelicans sit at No. 10 in the lottery standings with just a 1.1 percent shot at landing the top pick. If their pick doesn’t land in the top three, it goes to the Kings as payment for the DeMarcus Cousins trade. It would take a miracle for New Orleans to make this selection, but Lonzo Ball would be a perfect fit if it happens.

Anthony Davis and Cousins deserve a point guard with special vision and passing instincts. Ball would help supercharge an offense that finished No. 26 in efficiency this season. Find a couple shooters on the wings and the Pelicans could turn their fortunes around quickly.